Andrea and I have thrush.
I had no idea what thrush was because Sofia didn't have it so I was completely clueless. I thought it was just milk on her tongue. I was over at my girlfriend's house and she was holding Andrea when she looked at me and was like, "Um, you know she's got thrush right?" I gasped, clutched my pearls and said "What's thrush?!"
I'll tell you what thrush is. It's the mother-effin' DEVIL, that's what it is.
I ran to the pharmacy, got some Gentian Violet and painted her up for seven days. It made a little bit of difference, but I didn't know that we both have to be treated at the same time and I didn't treat myself, so while it cleared up a little bit, just as soon as I stopped the Gentian Violet, it came right back because she'd probably given it to me and I gave it right back to her. Then I started having pain so I painted myself with the Gentian Violet and hoped that would help some.
My poor baby
This was after she nursed because I had painted my nipples.
When you put it on the baby, you're only supposed to paint their tongue and the inside of their cheeks. I don't want anyone Googling thrush, seeing this picture and thinking you're supposed to paint the outside of their cheeks.
I was still having pain and her tongue was still coated so we went to the doctor on Monday who confirmed that Andrea has a mild case of thrush. She and I both got some Diflucan, I got some nipple ointment and I've been cursing ever since.
This shit HURTS and I'm heartbroken that my baby might be in pain too. She hasn't been fussy so I'm hoping it's a mild enough case that maybe she's not in pain. It just sucks.
Apparently, to get rid of the yeast you have to starve it. That means that I have to mess with one of those elimination diets, which is pretty much my worst nightmare. I don't do well with cutting food out of my diet. It's not good for my brain. However, I don't have a choice; I want my baby to be healthy again so I'm looking at The Candida Diet, which is a big fat pile of bullshit.
Thrush is a yeast infection, so to get rid of it, they say you have to starve the yeast. Well, yeast feeds on sugar so you have to cut sugar out of your diet. Except,
there's sugar in EVERYTHING. EVERY MOTHER-EFFIN THING YOU CAN THINK OF.
The only things I can safely eat are meat, vegetables, eggs and plain yogurt. Sounds YUMMY.
I'm using my nipple ointment, I'm taking the Diflucan, I'm on probiotics, washing everything in hot water, all that shit. But it makes no difference if the food I eat feeds the yeast. This sucks BALLS.
I need to hear from you, my friends. Have you dealt with thrush? How long did it take to go away? Did you do an elimination diet? It's only been a couple of days and I'm twitching. I want sandwiches, I want fruit, I want cupcakes, I want fruit snacks, I want juice, I want pancakes and syrup, I want sugar!!!!
Please help. Remind me that I'm doing this for my daughter, that this sacrifice is necessary for her health. Remind me that it's temporary. Remind me that I'm strong and I can do this. Remind me that cutting this stuff out will make the thrush go away faster.
Because let me tell you, a sandwich with no bread is just STUPID and reading something only to find out it has sugar makes me want to throw things. Why the F is there sugar in mayonnaise?
Hopefully I'll be back soon with a birthday recap and I can stare longingly at all the delicious cupcakes we served. And the sandwiches. And the donuts.
Ugh, let me stop. I should probably go eat some carrots and hummus or something.
Thrush is the devil.